Tonight, I just ended a 2 week sexual affair with one helluva gorgeous man.
Sebastian wanted too much, too soon, and although I share his sentiment, I know in my heart that at this point, I'm just not ready to start another committed relationship--much less sustain it.
I've been holding back from calling him on my way home from his place to say I've changed my mind and that I'm willing to give us a try.
But the truth is that we're both headed in very different directions in our lives. And as much as it frustrates me, I need to acknowledge and remember that we're complete opposites when the bedroom doors open. We're simply too different.
We agreed to stay friends, but I don't know if he's going to want to pursue a platonic frienship after I let him down.
It would suck not to be able to spend as much time with him in the future and although I know I will definitely miss losing myself in those gorgeous pale green eyes, or waking up to realize he'd been holding me in his arms all night, or hear him whisper in my ear sweet nothings in Spanish (he's Argentine) as we make love, and definitely feeling so damn sexy everytime he looks at me, I still haven't forgotten how much I had suffered the consequences of rushing into a relationship that I wasn't ready for.
If this is something that I am supposed to be thanking myself later on, then I had better be extremely grateful because right now...
MATURITY SUCKS STINKY ASS!!!
